15 years

"Cassie, will you make me fruit salad?"

This is what 15 years later looks like.  A visual reminder of how God's grace surpassed my depth ridden sin, His gracious gift of favor increasing all the more.

How I wish I had had this picture the day I clasped with both hands a pregnancy test that seemed to scream, what now...what now?  It might have helped my fearful heart all those long nights of wondering to see that things were going to turn out just fine.  Better than fine in fact, abundantly filled is a better description.  
But I didn't have a picture into the future to encourage the pressing on of my heart.  Like all girls in my situation I had to be brave.  I had to be willing.  

​"But where sin increased, [God's remarkable, gracious gift of] grace [His unmerited favor] has surpassed it and increased all the more."  
Romans 5:20

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​"Increased all the more..."

The days sweep by quickly, planned and full.  Daily work penciled into ringed notebooks, an opportunity for love words to be tattooed onto hearts.  Being Teacher-Mom opens a double door of blessing and freedom.  Walking through challenging arithmetic lessons with a girl susceptible to tear stained cheeks and having the chance to comfort in motherly fashion lays the foundation of learning as a beautiful journey rather than a dutiful task.

"As the years pass, I am coming more and more to understand that it is the common, everyday blessings of our common everyday lives for which we should be particularly grateful."  - Laura Ingalls Wilder, Writings To Young Women On Wisdom and Virtue

Standing in the kitchen, sun streaks across dirty floor, woodstove crackling with every birch curl swallowed by flames and children squealing in the farthest room. 
The walls heavy with life.  

Dining room table filled with books of various grade levels, Valentine flowers saying their goodbyes in powdery pollen hills dropped gladly on finished work just to be blown onto the post lunch floor tiles.  
Abundant living.

The sound of the vacuum running over living room rug back and forth while small slipper wearing boys pull feet up onto the couch, clutching prized Lego formations yelling over the hum of Mama's cleaning frenzy.  
Unexpected life found.

Quilts overtop of cotton throws pulled up to the chins of girls, evening reading aloud with bellies filled full of creamy potato cheddar broccoli soup, tea cups everywhere, left on window sills and side tables.  The tea box running low always.  
Numbering days lived and tea bags steeped.

A girl tall and fit with hair tied up in a half bun of freshly washed brunette youth spins her way into the kitchen like a spring breeze, "can I flip the pancakes, Mom?"  Her eyes sparkle in story telling, her heart wraps tightly around those smaller than she, with diligence she sets her mind to her work and the most speedy grace falls from her forgiving lips daily.  
15 years later

And His grace Increased all the more...